In the City…

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Finding tranquil sounds amongst the red lights and rushing cars.

Seeking silence within busy streets and hectic movement.

Loving deeply during chaotic thoughts and uncertainty.

Returning to self through mindful chatter and inner stillness.

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Free-Spirit

I’ve been called a free-spirit more than once. More often in the last few years than ever before. Maybe the labeling lingo has transformed from rebellious, independent, and adventurous into free-spirited or maybe it was quitting my government job to work outdoors and travel.

Google tells us that a free-spirit is an independent or uninhibited person. While dictionary.com elaborates by saying a free-spirit is a person with a highly individual or unique attitude, lifestyle, or imagination. Some even go as far as calling them ‘nonconformists’.

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In society, being called a free-spirit has a negative taste that lingers. Where that mindset began I do not know. What I do know is that if one must put labels on us then I am pleased with free spirit. You see, to me a free spirit is…

A person with a unique attitude of refusing to compromise his/her truth, loving freely and living wholeheartedly. Offering hugs to strangers, entertaining small children, and practicing random acts of kindness; even though…society balks at openness and vulnerability.

Being a free-spirit doesn’t mean shunning away responsibility or structure. But it does mean being spontaneous whenever time allows and going against the flow of societal norms.

Living a unique lifestyle today is a person who enjoys the moment. Finds the magic in the ordinary and revels in the beauty all around.

Someone that doesn’t hesitate to kick off his/her shoes and flop down in the bright lush green grass to take in the sunshine and fresh air. Even if only for a moment.

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A free-spirit will always find time to tell you how special you are to his/her world. Open his/her heart to you. How scary that can be for any non-free-spirit. Accept it and be open to receive this beautiful gift.

It doesn’t matter what he/she does for a living or enjoys in his/her free time. It’s his/her openness to live life as an adventure in each moment, every deep connection and all passionate experiences that makes him/her a free spirit.

Free spirited people are sensitive souls and recharge through their connection with nature. It’s important for them to spend time outside in reflection and solitude.

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One who is labeled a free spirit thinks about the future, plans and wants to build a life. The difference – the free spirited can put it into perspective, stay present and make goals. He/She knows holding too tight to a plan full of precise goals and mile markers becomes to strict and closed to all possible opportunities leaving no room for error.

If you are lucky enough for a free-spirit to enter your world…brace yourself!  Let him/her in, open yourself up to his/her love and step out of your comfort zone. He/She will scare the hell out of you, love you like no other, make your heart sing and hold strong at your side through thick and thin.

This an opportunity for intense love, growth and intimate connection that you will regret walking away from…especially if that walk is lead by fear. Choose love over fear, be vulnerable letting him/her love you fully and you’ll see…the free spirit will give you all of him/herself.

2020

A few weeks ago, someone I have come to respect and care for deeply asked an intricate question. This question has been pin-balling around my mind, bouncing through my heart and containing my thoughts even since he uttered those words so nonchalantly.

Tell me where you are in 5 years??

5 years…that’s a long time from now or is it?? Wow, 2020. Really? What does that look like and feel like? For me, for the planet, for the world? Can anyone really say for sure? So many questions…where does one find the answers?

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Do I hold tight to a plan full of precise goals and mile markers or do I just let go of what I want and see how life unfolds? The first is so…so strict and closed to all possible opportunities leaving no room for error. No room for new ideas.. The latter? The latter is, well, irresponsible and childish lacking direction and responsibility. Or is it?

I am not confused about what I want. I want to quench my thirst for life and nourish my soul. I want to grow and expand in ways never thought possible. I want to break my heart wide open, touch lives and inspire those around me. I want to love so strongly it’s unstoppable. A life overflowing with compassion, wonder and beauty. All shared with that one…that one who get’s me and I get him, engulfing each other in love, support and understanding.

Is that too much to ask? Am I supposed to be more methodical and realistic? Conforming to society, moving to the rhythmic drumbeat of the status quo. I fight the pressures of the crowd that unconsciously conditions our minds, tells us to follow the path of least resistance. I will not succumb to ‘normal’. That is not who I am nor who I want to be.

My relationships are not shallow. Tears flow, my heart breaks, and disappointments are inevitable. I am still me: fiercely loyal, understanding, intense, and intrepidly passionate. When I love you, you know it. It’s available to everyone I invite into my life. I give all of myself…

I may not have a set plan for year 2020 but….I most certainly know the type of life I will live. I will stand up for what I believe and fight for the environment that is so crucial to our well-being. Spread loving-kindness and teach others to cultivate self-love. Live my life wholeheartedly with adventure, heartfelt connections, and finding magic in the ordinary. What exactly that will look like I do not know and that’s ok.

So tell me….where will you be in 5 years??

What do you choose?

Cool morning
Sipping coffee
Thoughts racing
Chaos ensues
Page is empty
I remember…
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I chose
To live wholeheartedly
Be vulnerable
Making each moment magical
Each experience precious.
Opening my heart to
deep connections
passionate adventures
heartfelt experiences
Only I know
the inevitable is just around the corner
It will bite me in the ass or
Stab me in the heart
It’s only a matter of time
But without all that,
I lose so much more of life.
I will
Break myself open
over and over again
Hold strong
Love uninhibited
Have courage
Be me
Let my light shine
Live life fully.

Morning Mind

Blurry morning staring into the dark.
Mind tugs ... 
climb back under the embracing warmth of the covers.  
Something inside eases the tug as I stand in the doorway,
feeling the cool darkness of night hanging on.
Embracing energetic movements as the night breaks way to morning, 
intoxicating my senses, 
melting my heart with the miracles of the day.

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